Geek Jitsu – top three annoying people at the gym

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Working out is fun. Really, believe me, it is! Once you get into the groove of living healthy and sweating like a beast, you will agree with me. What is also fun is the fact that you can do it together with other people. You can go to the gym with your best friend, sign up for a martial arts course with your brother, or go running with your mother! Sports connect people on a different level, and once you experience that yourself you will see how powerful the bond forged with blood, sweat and tears is.

However, not all the people you meet during your workouts are fun. Some of them are just a little bit annoying, others are a royal pain in the ass. In this edition of Geek Jitsu, I want to share my top three of most annoying people you can meet during your workouts. Bask in the annoyance I share with you, and be wary of these people!

Before diving right into my hatred, I want to make one thing very clear: I respect everyone who makes time to work out, and you are cool if you care for your health. I just want to describe some stereotypes that annoy me. Nothing more, just some good ol’ frustration given a place on the Internet. That’s what this thing is for, right?

Number 3: the blabbermouth

Don’t get me wrong, I like chatting during my workouts. When I’m drilling during my BJJ classes, I don’t mind having a chat with my partner. However, what’s important to me is to do the damn drill. I don’t pay a subscription fee to talk with people, I want to train and learn! So, after a few lines, I like to shut up and continue my training. Sadly, not everyone thinks so.

Blabbermouthes come in many varieties, but the most annoying one is the new guy who thinks he knows it all. I can relate to that: when you are really enthusiastic about what you do, you love to share your knowledge with others. That’s fine, but it becomes problematic when you refuse to accept corrections from more experience athletes and start to drown out their well-meant advice with your constant stream of pretentious half-knowledge. Instead of talking all the time, why not close that mouth, open your ears, and speak when you have something useful to say? You’d do the world a favour.

Number 2: The Facebook logger

It’s fine to inform your social media contacts about your activities. That’s what sites like Facebook and Twitter are made for. What isn’t okay is if you spam my feed with a stream of status updates about how your workout is progressing. Why would you tweet halfway through your run about how you’re doing? Why would you want to tell anyone about how you don’t feel like working out, but should do it because you’re oh so fat? Nobody cares, and fishing for compliments is something for the attention whores (oh, I’ll get to you in a few moments!).

Please, dear Facebook loggers, don’t tell me every time you go to the gym, and especially don’t waste your precious workout time with updating your feed. Go hard, and earn your recognition with the visible results. I will more likely like your good looks afterwards than any of your Facebook updates.

Number 1: the attention whores

Everyone likes to get attention. I won’t lie to you: one of the most common reasons to get into shape is to hear people say things like “Damn you look good!” or “Wow, I hardly recognised you with those Goku-like abs”. I like that, and that’s fine. What is an absolute no-go is if you’re obviously just working out to draw attention.

Yeah, I’m talking to you, Miss Far-Too-Tight-Yoga-Pants-And-Navel-Showing-Tank-Top. I know you spend more time choosing your training outfit than actually training. I’m also talking to you, Mister Overcompensating-Former-Fat-Guy-Who-Know-Identifies-Himself-Only-Through-His-Biceps. I know you didn’t get many compliments when you were the chubby guy who didn’t get a prom date, but you’re still more than just your looks!

Really, dear attention whores, if you would spend more time working out than being pretty to fill a hole caused by your insecurities, you would get all the admiration and respect. I won’t respect you for wearing shorts that give your butt the perfect shape, but for how much you can lift or how far you can run. Of course, I will still look, but boys will be boys…

That’s my dose of annoyance for this week. What kind of people do you hate at the gym? Do you recognise yourself in one of these over-characterised stereotypes? Hit me up in the comments, and keep on training!

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